Living Fearless

Do you hear that? The sound of no one speaking or even making a sound. The sound of pure shock and adrenaline pumping through your veins. The sound of silent fear rushing through everyone’s mind. I heard it.

It was a beautiful afternoon at baseball practice, I was the new kid who just moved from Kansas making the high school baseball team in Georgia my junior year. I played baseball for 13 years of my life and I was always a decent shortstop. I have always been smaller than everyone else in my grade and I had to work harder to get where I needed to be compared to everyone else. One of my life goals was to be a professional baseball player and I loved the game. I will never forget my coach saying, “Keep up the good work and you may get a starting position,” before hitting the first ball in practice that beautiful afternoon.

The ball was airborne, and I was going for it, “Ball, Ball, Ball!!” and before I knew it, I was airborne diving for the ball in between me and the left fielder at full speed. In that moment I saw my life flash before my eyes. I hear the sound of fear and quietness around me. My teammates come rushing over to me, seeing my face bruised and dented in by the knee of the left fielder as he tried jumping over me. I hear my coach on the phone with 911 in panic of what just happened. I am numb, adrenaline rushing through my veins and being fully aware of where I was and who I was.

The ambulance shows up and I am on a stretcher. I can feel the fear of my teammates around me, as they all form a line around me on each side of the stretcher watching me being led out of the field to the ambulance. I get rushed to Savannah Memorial Hospital, which is a trauma one hospital. All I could think about through all of this is, “How am I alive?” I was praying to God to help me and to heal me from this.  As I’m being led into the hospital I see the fear in the eyes of my parents and the hope that I would be okay. I hear the fear of curiosity in the voices of the nurses and doctors. As I’m in the hospital I can feel the warm liquid of morphine and the pain coming to an ease, and before I knew it, I was going into surgery with a shattered orbital bone.

A few days pass and I am okay, I have a titanium plate in my head and a scar on my forehead that is hardly noticeable. I am alive. Through this whole process, I learned something. I learned that I never felt fear in this fearful situation, I felt at peace of what was happening to me. I am glad this happened to me because it taught me to live my life fearless of what is to come in the future. It taught me to trust God no matter what is happening to me because God is our peace, our shelter, and I will always remember to never fear for what is temporary and hope for the things that are eternal.

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